Sunday, September 27, 2015

I hate MS.

Today, I am angry. I am angry at MS for how it has changed me. Let me breakdown for you how it has changed me.

WORK: I barely make it through 7 hours. I can't remember customers orders. I get overwhelmed when it's busy. I don't do numbers. I have to sit often.

PARENTING: I am so exhausted from work that when I come home, listening to everything is sometimes too much. I can't remember things she tells me. She sometimes laughs when I can't get the words out.

DATING: I don't have the energy for spending countless nights on the town. He works days. I work evenings. It's hard. Explaining my MS symptoms is exhausting.

FRIENDSHIPS: I forgot my friends birthday. Not just any friend...but my best friend since Jr high. We usually have a birthday dinner. Not this year. :( a lot like w dating, I don't have the energy. I can't remember. Or I'm too much like their grandma with my bladder issues....

I HATE MS. I want to be able to work, parent, and build relationships with all of me! Not just the little bit at the end of the day. I am taking a day to just be me and not fight any battles. I will work on mending tomorrow. But for today, I just need to be me with MS. Because that is a lot of discomfort and pain people don't know or understand because I'm wearing a smile.

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